A Quick Trip into Chuquita Land
by Marie Nomad
Summary: Okay, what happens when normal DBZ characters meet the slightly off Chuquita versions of themselves? Insanity and lots of snowstorms in HIFL! Supported by Chuquita herself.


Okay, here's the lowdown. The weird world in which we will explore belongs to Chuquita. However, all characters you recognize belong to Akira Toriyama. The Long Haired Gohan that looks like Radditz belongs to Nadia Rose.   
  
A Quick Trip into Chuquitaland  
Or  
Snowstorms In Hell  
By Maria Cline  
  
It was a beautiful day at Capsule Corps as Bulma Briefs was working on her latest invention. "Okay... I think we're all set to test the first inter-dimentional portal." Bulma said as put the final touches on her masterpiece.   
  
"About time." Vegita grunted as he crossed his arms.   
  
Goku looked over at his wife who was standing next to him. "Chi Chi, are you sure you want to be this close? There's no telling what kind of monster or alien would come out?!"  
  
"I'll be fine. I want to see this for myself. Besides, I have faith in Bulma's inventing skills." Chi Chi insists as she smiled at Goku and then held up a huge rifle. "Besides, I have protection."  
  
Bulma went up to the control room and said over the speaker, "Now, I've targeted the portal to open up to any Earth that is inhabitable. It also targets worlds with all of our ki signatures so we can't accidentally bring in some evil enemy that took over the world. Ready?"  
  
"Bring it on." Vegita said as he went into defense position.  
  
*****  
  
It was a beautiful day at Capsule Corps as Bulma Briefs was working on her latest invention. "Okay... I think we're all set to test the first inter-dimentional portal." Bulma said as put the final touches on her masterpiece.   
  
"About time." Vegita grunted as he crossed his arms.   
  
"Yay! We get to see alternate versions of me!!!" Goku cheered as he waved his hands around.  
  
"As long as we don't see any versions of Ouji." Chi Chi growled as she held up a huge rifle. "I got something just in case."  
  
"Ha! That rifle won't hurt the Prince of all Saiyans!" Vegita boasted, "Not even any alternate verson of me."   
  
Bulma went up to the control room and said over the speaker, "Now, I've targeted the portal to open up to any Earth that is inhabitable. It also targets worlds with all of our ki-signatures so we can't accidentally bring in some evil enemy that took over the world. Ready?"  
  
"Bring it on." Vegita said as he went into defense position.  
  
"Yeah! I wanna see lots of Veggies and mes!" Goku cheered as he waved his arms again and accidentally slapped the machine. "Oops." Goku muttered as he inched away slowly.  
  
The machine hummed and a bright window opened.  
  
*****  
  
Bulma tapped on the controls and a bright window opened. The three watched the portal intensely. Nothing seemed wrong. Suddenly, the window flashed and Goku, Chi Chi and Vegita felt their bodies being tugged. Chi Chi screamed as she let go of her rifle and it flew through the portal. "Goku!!!"  
  
Goku grabbed Chi Chi and then Vegita grabbed Goku's shoulder. "Kakarot! Teleport us out now!" Vegita ordered.  
  
Goku nodded and put his fingers to his forehead. The three vanished and the window let loose a bright light.  
  
Bulma screamed as she ducked, praying that Goku's fast reflexes would save her husband and friends. After the portal died down, she looked up and saw the room empty. "Guys?" She wondered.  
  
*****  
  
Goku, Chi Chi, and Vegita landed on the soft green grass outside of Capsule Corps. After checking themselves to make sure they weren't missing any parts, they sighed in relief.   
  
"That was one of the worst teleports I've ever experienced." Vegita said as he rubbed his head.   
  
"Sorry, at least we're alive." Goku said optimistcally.  
  
"True... I'll go and tell Bulma we're still alive." Vegita said as he flew away.  
  
"Wanna go with him?" Goku offered as he picked up his wife.   
  
"No... I'm tired." Chi Chi said as she held her head, "I need to go home."  
  
"Okay, I'll teleport us home and we can rest." Goku said as he put his fingers to his forehead. He frowned as he scanned the planet.  
  
"Goku?" Chi Chi whispered at Goku's look of concern.  
  
"I'm fine." Goku smiled slightly, "It's just that the planet doesn't... feel right somehow."  
  
"Oh... dear, you must just be rattled by that bad teleport." Chi Chi said, "Let's just go home."  
  
"Right!" Goku put his fingers onto his forehead and the two vanished.  
  
*****  
  
**Note: From now on, the alternate versions of Goku, Chi Chi, and Vegita will be known as C-Goku, C-Chi Chi, and C-Vegita.**  
  
"Awww... it didn't work." C-Goku moaned, disappointed.  
  
"I don't get it!" Bulma muttered as she came in and checked the machine. "It worked perfectly." She looked to see a slightly dented part of the machine. "Hey! Who dented it?"  
  
"Eh..." C-Goku laughed nervously as he rubbed the back of his head. "Sorry."   
  
"Goku! You idiot!" Bulma screamed, "I'll have to repair this. Okay, as punishment, you can't spar with Vegita for a week."  
  
"Aww... Bulma!" C-Goku whined, "I didn't mean to break it!"  
  
"Thank you so much, Bulma!" C-Chi Chi cheered, "Yay! No evil Ouji for a week!"  
  
"Kakay!" C-Vegita growled, "Now, look at what you did! I can't spar with you for an entire week." He looked forlornly, "An entire week without you, Kaka-chan."  
  
"Wah!!! A week without Veggie!" C-Goku cried as streams of tears flowed down his face. "WAH!!!"  
  
"Awww... don't worry, Goku-sa." C-Chi Chi cooed, "I'll be cooking your favorite dinner, fish."  
  
"Fish?!" C-Goku brightened up and said, "Okay! See ya in a week, Veggie!" He put his fingers to his forehead as he took Chi Chi's hand and vanished.  
  
"Awwww... I'll get you yet, Kakay!" C-Vegita vowed.  
  
*****  
  
Goku and Chi Chi appeared at their house. "That adventure made me hungry." Goku said as he rubbed his stomach.  
  
"I'll go and make your favorite dinner." Chi Chi said as she and Goku entered the house. Goku sat down on the sofa as Chi Chi went into the kitchen.   
  
"Glad to survive that experience." Goku said as he picked up the picture on the table and gasped. On the picture was his family, but it also had Mirai Trunks, a man who he was sure looked like Veggito, and a small girl who looked like a mini-Bulma. "CHI CHI!" Goku screamed as he jumped up and ran to the kitchen.  
  
Chi Chi was on her chair flipping through her planner. She looked up and exclaimed, "Goku! Look at this!" She opened her planner. "This isn't my planner."  
  
"Yeah! And this picture." Goku said as he held the picture. The two traded and Goku flipped through the planner. "Okay... Monday, cook steak, go to grocery store... prevent Vegita from getting Goku to be servant maid?! Tuesday, cook fish, do laundry, go to grocery store... prevent Vegita from getting Goku to wear stupid pink bow..." He looked at the book and said, "This isn't our world!"  
  
Chi Chi's heart pounded as she put down the picture. "Goku... we must've gotten sucked in and you must've teleported outside after we arrived in this world."  
  
"Oh shit!" Goku screamed as he held his head. "We gotta go home! Bulma and the others must be worried sick!"  
  
"I know." Chi Chi confessed as she picked up the planner again.  
  
Suddenly, the door opened and another Goku and Chi Chi came in. C-Goku looked at Goku and said, "Oh... hi."  
  
C-Chi Chi and Chi Chi looked at each other and finally C-Chi Chi saw the planner in her hand. "Hey! That's my planner! Give that back!" She flung herself at Chi Chi. "Ya!!!"  
  
"Oh no you don't!" Chi Chi dropped the planner and the two Chi Chis fought.   
  
"No! Chi Chi!" Goku came up and put his hand on C-Chi Chi's forehead. The woman collapsed.  
  
Chi Chi sighed in relief as she smiled at her husband. "Thanks, Goku."  
  
C-Goku screamed, "Chi Chi!" He came up to her and held her body. He glared at his counterpart and said, "You knocked out my wife! You must be an evil clone!" He went super saiyan and blasted at Goku.  
  
"Gah!" Goku grabbed Chi Chi and teleported away.  
  
*****  
  
Vegita went through the place he called his home back to the lab to tell his wife what happened. "Stupid inter-dimentional portal." He growled as he went down the hallway.  
  
"Daddy!" A little girl screamed as she ran up to him. Vegita was stunned. Who was this strange girl who called him 'Daddy'? She was a mini version of Bulma. "Mirai Trunks was being mean to me!"  
  
"I am not!" Mirai Trunks exclaimed as he came up holding a pink peice of metal. "Bura painted my time machine pink!"  
  
"I like pink! It looked so dull before!"  
  
"Trunks?" Vegita muttered stunned. **Damn it! I must be in another dimension! Have to get Kakarot and his mate.** "I don't have time for this... I'm going to out to train outside for awhile." He said as he walked back.  
  
"Ohh..." Bura blushed, "I get it..." She winked, "You wanna go to your true love, Kakay!"  
  
**Kakay? Am I having an affair?** "Yes. Tell the woman that I have work to do." Vegita ordered as he walked away. **Gotta go to Kakarot.** He thought as he ran outside before he get caught.  
  
"Veggie!" C-Goku exclaimed as he suddenly appeared holding an unconscious C-Chi Chi. "My evil clone and Chi Chi's broke into my house and knocked out my wife!"  
  
"What?!" Vegita exclaimed. He frowned at the man. This Goku's voice was much higher than his Goku's. "What happened to your voice?"  
  
"Huh? My voice is just fine." C-Goku said as he put down his wife. "Oh Veggie!!!" He wailed as he hugged Vegita. "I'm so scared!"  
  
Vegita glared at the man. Who had the right to hug him? "Get your hands off of me, Kakarot!"  
  
C-Goku blinked and let go. He tilted his head and said, "You didn't go red. And... have you grown?"  
  
"Uhhh... growth spurt." Vegita said as he winced at the high-pitched voice.   
  
"Vegita!" Goku said as he appeared out of nowhere.  
  
"EEEKKK!!! My evil clone!" C-Goku exclaimed in fear.  
  
"I'm not your evil clone!" Goku insisted, "And why does your voice sound so funny?"  
  
"Leave my Veggie chan alone!" C-Goku said as he hugged Vegita close to him.  
  
"Kakay!" C-Vegita said as he came up. "What are you doing with that imposter?!"  
  
"I'm confused." Mirai said as he looked around.  
  
"Trunks?!" Goku exclaimed as he looked at him.  
  
"Two Veggies?" C-Goku said as he glanced at the Vegita in his arms and the Vegita in the hall.   
  
"Get your hands off of me!" Vegita ordered as he charged up and blasted C-Goku back. "Kakarot!"  
  
Goku grabbed Vegita's hand and put his fingers to his forehead. "Later." He said as he vanished.  
  
*****  
  
Chi Chi paced back and forth in the cave. Goku had left her here so he could get Vegita with as little interference as possible. She was scared. Alternate versions of themsleves that acted nothing like they do. Especially the Goku of this world. He acted like a big baby and had a very high-pitch voice that made it sound like he was still in puberty.   
  
Goku and Vegita reappeared. "Back." Goku said in relief as he sat down.  
  
"What kind of twisted world did we end up in?" Vegita wondered, "My alternate version called your alternate version 'Kakay'. That's a ridiculous name! And I think those two are having some sordid affair."  
  
"So that explains the planner." Chi Chi muttered, "My alternate version knows about the affair and is trying to break your alternates up."  
  
Goku and Vegita turned green as they thought about even a remote possibility of them having any affair. "Let's try to get out of here." Goku suggested as he crossed his arms. "But how?"  
  
"We need the Dragon Balls. If our two worlds have the basic identical traits like Kakarot's existence... there must be Dragon Balls." Vegita figured, "But we'll need the Dragon Radar and that's at Capsule Corps."  
  
"We'll need our alternates' help to get back." Goku realized as he sighed. "Oh man. I gotta deal with him again. And they think that we're evil clones! There's only one thing to do." Goku went to the mouth of the cave. "I'm going there myself and try to convince our counterparts that we're good."  
  
"What if they don't believe you?" Vegita asked.  
  
"How can they not believe me?" Goku grinned, "You stay here and look after Chi Chi. If I'm not back in an hour, then something happened to me and you'll have to think of a new plan."  
  
"I'll go with you." Chi Chi said, "They might believe me."  
  
"No... if things get hairy, I'll have to teleport out and I'll need as little distraction as possible." Goku said as he put his hands on Chi Chi's shoulders. "I'll be fine. I promise."  
  
Chi Chi nodded. She knew that she could get in the way if things got out of hand, but she had to ask.   
  
"I can handle myself, Kakarot!" Vegita boomed as he stepped forward. "You could have to fight yourself and my counterpart! Together, we would stand a chance."  
  
"Vegita, we're not going against a supervillain. We're going against a few good people who just think we're evil." Goku logically said, "If we go in there together, the others would think that we're attacking. No, you stay here just in case something happens to me. If something happens to me, you and Chi Chi can go in next. Your vast knowledge of the Capsule Corps layout should help you. Just trust me, Vegita."  
  
Vegita sighed as he sat down. "Fine, one hour. But, if you are late, we will go in blasting."  
  
Goku nodded as he put his fingers to his forehead. "Thanks." He vanished.  
  
"Please, be careful." Chi Chi prayed.  
  
*****  
  
"Evil clones?!" Bulma exclaimed as C-Goku and C-Vegita told her, Bra, the two Trunks, Goten, Gohan, and C-Chi Chi.  
  
"Yeah! My evil clone was weird. He has no tail, his voice was so funny... and he didn't call Veggie... Veggie." C-Goku wailed as C-Vegita hold him.  
  
"There there... Kakay... I'm right here." C-Vegita cooed.  
  
"Keep your dirty Ouji hands off of my Goku!" C-Chi Chi ordered as she got out a frying pan and attacked the prince.  
  
"Hey! We got bigger problems!" Gohan screamed at the top of his lungs, "Like evil clones of Dad, Vegita, and Mom!"  
  
"Oh..." The two stopped their 'fighting' and sat back down.   
  
"After the evil clones are destroyed." C-Vegita said as he glared at the woman.  
  
"Fine."  
  
"We gotta lure the evil clones here." Bulma said as she paced back and forth. "Luckily I have special restraints just in case." She took out a small package.   
  
"How do you think they will get back here?" Mirai Trunks asked, "It's not like one of them will just show up out of nowhere."  
  
Suddenly, Goku appeared in the middle of the room and held up his hands. "Wait, I come in peace!"  
  
"Get him!" C-Vegita ordered as he snatched the package from Bulma's hands and tossed it on Goku.  
  
Goku became surrounded by a cloud of smoke and when the smoke cleared, the 'clone' fell over and found himself in a full body straitjacket. "Hmmph!!!"  
  
"You know, we could've asked him what he wanted." Gohan sighed as he knelt down by the struggling man. "Okay, no funny business." He warned as he unstrapped the mouth-piece.  
  
Goku gasped for air as he looked around. "Look, I'm not evil and I didn't mean to hurt your Chi Chi. I'm from an alternate dimension."  
  
"Oh please." C-Vegita said as he rolled his eyes. "You and that handsome man are clones! Your voice is different and that other me is taller!"  
  
"Damn it, Vegita! I hate it when you get so stubborn!" Goku spat out as he sat up.  
  
There was silence in the room. "Did that man just say dirty words?" Bulma gasped in astonishment.  
  
"Okay, he's evil!" C-Vegita confrimed as he strapped the mouth-piece back on. "No good Kakarot would dare catch himself saying dirty words. It's just not in his character."  
  
The others nodded and Goku moaned. **Oh man... these people are weird.**  
  
"I'll take him back to the lab." Bulma said as she and Gohan strapped Goku to a furniture roller. "Maybe we can find out what is he."  
  
Goku closed his eyes as he tried to send out a telepathic call for help only to find none. **Looks like I wait an hour.**  
  
*****  
  
Chi Chi paced along the cave as Vegita sat on the floor meditating. "Damn it, woman, stop pacing." Vegita said as he opened one eye.  
  
"I can't help it. We're stuck in some freaky alternate universe with no way of coming home, our counterparts think we're evil clones, and Goku's been gone for an hour!" Chi Chi ranted.  
  
Vegita reached into his glove and got out a small watch. "Twenty minutes."  
  
"Long enough!" Chi Chi screamed as she got out a rifle. "Goku's in trouble! We have to save him!"  
  
Vegita grabbed the rifle at superspeed. "Look, I'm anxious too but we can't just barge in like a pair of hotheads!"  
  
Chi Chi growled as she sat down. "Forty more minutes. Then, we're going."  
  
"Good."  
  
"But, shouldn't we think of some plan in the meantime, Goku's life could be in danger."  
  
"Kakarot is one of the most powerful warriors in the universe, in any universe, what can they do to him?" Vegita said realistically.  
  
Chi Chi scowled at him. "What would you do to an evil clone of Goku?"  
  
Vegita smirked as he nodded. "Hmm... yeah... fine, we'll think of a plan."  
  
*****  
  
"This is fun!" C-Goku said as he and C-Vegita were playing tic-tac-toe on Goku's chest.  
  
Goku glared at the two. **Hey! Leave me alone!** He thought as he struggled.  
  
"Keep still, you phoney!" C-Vegita said as he smacked the man on the head.   
  
"What do you bozos think you're doing?!" Bulma demanded as she came in and saw the two Saiyans doodling.  
  
"We're playing with our prisoner." C-Goku cheerfully explained.  
  
"I can't believe you two would do something like that?!" Bulma chided, "If you two don't stop, no sparring for a month!"  
  
"Awww... Bulma..." The two Saiyans whined.  
  
Goku watched the three. Thankfully, this Bulma didn't seem that different from his Bulma. He had to try something to convince Bulma to unstrap his mouthpiece. **This will be hard.** Goku thought as he closed his eyes. He focused on his eyes and tears started come come out. He whimpered as he looked at the three.  
  
"Awww... my evil clone is crying." C-Goku whispered, "Maybe, we should show mercy to him..."  
  
"He's your evil clone!" C-Vegita argued, "It's probably some evil clone trick!"  
  
"Guys... are you sure that he is an evil clone?" Bulma asked as she came up to the tied up Saiyan. "I'll just ungag him." She undid the strap and Goku let out a huge sigh of relief.  
  
"Thanks, Bulma. I needed that." Goku said as he looked at the woman. "Look, I'm sorry about the misunderstanding earlier but you must understand that I am from an alternate universe. I'm not an evil clone, I'm your counterpart."  
  
"But, if you're my counterpart, why is your voice so deep?" C-Goku asked, "And your Veggie is so tall!"  
  
"I don't know." Goku shrugged the best he could. "Maybe we developed differently in our universe. Look, I'm sorry for knocking off your wife but she attacked my wife. And we just need to get home."  
  
"Awww... sorry we didn't believe you." C-Goku reached up to untie his counterpart before being pulled back. "Hey!"  
  
"How do we know he's telling the truth?" C-Vegita asked, "I don't trust him. What if it's some evil clone trick?"  
  
"Good point..." C-Goku pondered, "I got it! I'll just read his mind!"  
  
"No!" Goku screamed as he tried get out. "We're virtually the same person, if our minds come in contact, there's no telling what would happen!"  
  
C-Goku gasped as he stepped back. "Yeah... I might start saying bad words like you!"  
  
**And I'll get an IQ of a cantaloupe.** Goku thought, "Why not have someone else read my mind, like... Piccolo?"  
  
"Yeah! Piccolo can do it!" C-Goku gushed, "I'll go and get him right away!" He put his fingers onto his forehead and vanished.  
  
*****  
  
"Okay, an hour has passed." Vegita said as he and Chi Chi came out from the bushes just in front of Capsule Corps. "Now... we will barge in and demand that we get Kakarot back."  
  
"But, we're outnumbered and out-muscled. We have to sneak in somehow." Chi Chi muttered.  
  
"And what can we do? Just abduct some poor sap and take his identity?" Vegita asked. Then a car pulled up in front of them with a man and a woman in the front seat.  
  
Chi Chi and Vegita shrugged and ambushed the two.  
  
*****  
  
The two came out of the bushes wearing business suits and glasses. Chi Chi's long hair was tied up in a loose ponytail with a barrette while Vegita was wearing a hat.  
  
"I feel like a nerd." Vegita grumbled as he looked at his glasses.  
  
"It's for a higher cause." Chi Chi reasoned as she and Vegita came to the front door. "We have to save Goku and then convince those idiots that we are good guys."  
  
"And so we are going in disguised as salespeople?" Vegita grunted as he patted his briefcase.  
  
"Yes."   
  
Chi Chi and Vegita came at the door and Vegita quickly tapped in the access code. "I hope Bulma was the one who programmed the password." Vegita hoped as he tapped on the panel. The door opened and the two quickly went in. "Hurry, there's probably tons of security drones here." Vegita said as he grabbed Chi Chi and rushed through the doors.  
  
*****  
  
"I'm baaackk!" C-Goku sang as he and Piccolo appeared.   
  
Piccolo looked over at Goku and said, "He's the evil clone?"  
  
"I'm not an evil clone." Goku argued as he studied Piccolo carefully. He seemed like his own Piccolo but he could sense a deep-rooted feeling of evil in him. "Hello."  
  
"Hello." Piccolo replied as he nodded. He looked over at his Goku and Vegita and said, "I'll take it from here. You two better leave."  
  
"Can't I watch?" C-Goku whined.  
  
"No! Go!" Piccolo ordered as he sweat-dropped, "Please."  
  
"Come on, Kakay, we can sneak in some sparring." C-Vegita said as he grabbed C-Goku's hand and led him out.  
  
"Yay! I love sparring with Veggie!" C-Goku gushed.  
  
"Oh man..." Goku sighed as he shook his head.   
  
Piccolo smirked as he looked at the tied up Saiyan. This evil clone or whatever he may be was a mirror image of Goku. He looked and felt just like Goku, but he sounded and acted different. This might be his chance to take over the world. "So... you are from an alternate world."  
  
"Yeah..." Goku nodded, "Can you help me?"  
  
"I can... if I want to." Piccolo said evilly as he leaned closer. "You see, I have this life long dream of taking over the world and I want you to help me make it a reality."  
  
Goku's eyes widened. "What?! You want to take over the world?!"  
  
"Didn't your Piccolo want to take over the world?"   
  
"No! Of course not!" Goku frowned and said, "At least, I don't think so. He hasn't made any attempts to take over the world recently... what am I thinking?!" The warrior bashed the back of his head against the headboard. Piccolo rose an eyebrow at the warrior. He may look like Goku but he didn't talk like him.   
  
"Okay..." Piccolo muttered, "now, if you help me take over the world, I'll help you go home and even give you part of Earth. If you don't... things will get messy."  
  
Goku sighed as he pondered. **Let's see... help Piccolo and go home or stay here?** "Okay, I'll do it. I can teach you how to teleport. Just press your forefinger and your middle finger against my forehead."  
  
Piccolo frowned but did as the Saiyan told him. "Okay."  
  
Goku focused hard on his Chi Chi and Vegita's power level. They were close, he could feel it. "Thanks." Goku said as he vanished.  
  
Piccolo paled as he stared at the empty spot in front of him. "He... tricked me?"  
  
*****  
  
King Yemma was busy doing paperwork when a demon came in wearing a huge coat and stocking cap. He shivered slightly and said, "King Yemma, Hell just froze over!"  
  
*****  
  
Chi Chi and Vegita walked through the halls, anxiously keeping an eye out for any clues of their Goku's whereabouts.   
  
"I think he's this way." Vegita commented as he gestured forward. "I can't be entirely sure, the other Kakarot is interfering with my senses."  
  
"I know... but we just have to hope those... dopplegangers didn't kill my Goku." Chi Chi said as she adjusted her glasses.  
  
"Hi!" C-Goku exclaimed as he appeared out of nowhere.  
  
Chi Chi and Vegita jumped back in shock.  
  
"Who are you?" C-Goku asked in his strange high-pitched voice as he tilted his head.  
  
"We're... sales people, sent to speak to Bulma Briefs." Vegita replied as he lowered his Ki.  
  
"Oh! She's that way!" C-Goku said as he pointed to his right. "I can Instant Transmission you if you want!"  
  
"No!" Chi Chi screamed as she held up her hand. "I think walking is more appropriate, thank you anyway."  
  
"Oh-kay!" C-Goku grinned as he walked away. He turned around briefly and commented, "You know, you two look awfully familiar... like... I've met you before..." Chi Chi and Vegita sweat-dropped as C-Goku studied them. "oh well!" He said as he left and then Chi Chi and Vegita facefaulted.  
  
"Honestly! I don't know how this Kakarot has survived." Vegita moaned as he got up.  
  
"Neither do I." Chi Chi agreed as she got up.  
  
Suddenly, out of nowhere, Goku appeared on the ground and looked up. "Chi Chi? Vegita? Is that you?"  
  
"Goku, are you okay?" Chi Chi asked concerned as she pulled the bound Saiyan onto his feet.  
  
"I'll be fine, just get me out of this thing!" Goku moaned as he hopped while he struggled in his straitjacket.  
  
Vegita chuckled at the sight. "I see they had caught you unprepared, Kakarot." He commented as he reached up and unstrapped his fellow warrior. Goku nearly fell over as his bonds were quickly removed and he stumbled onto his feet.   
  
"Completely... this planet is very weird. Do you know that in this world, Piccolo is still plotting to take over the world?" Goku asked as he regained his balance.  
  
"Right now, I believe anything weird is possible in this world." Chi Chi sighed as she rubbed her eyes.   
  
"Say, why are you two in those ridiculous disguises?" Goku asked as he folded his straitjacket up.  
  
"To get in and save your ass." Vegita replied as he smirked. "How did you teleport here?"  
  
"Can't say right now, let's just get the Dragon Radar." Goku said as he looked around. "Quick, Vegita, where would the Dragon Radar be?"  
  
"In the lab in a drawer, at least in our world. I don't know about this world." Vegita replied.  
  
"We better go." Chi Chi said as she took off her glasses. "We can't afford to get caught."  
  
"Here, I got something for you." Vegita got out a trench coat, hat, and fake glasses. "This should disguise you."  
  
Goku frowned as he slipped on the disguise. "Are you sure this will work? I mean, our counterparts can sense Ki and read minds."  
  
"Trust me on this, these counterparts are missing a few screws." Chi Chi confessed as she put on her glasses again.  
  
Goku nodded in agreement and the three warriors walked down the hallway.  
  
*****  
  
"What?! You let that evil Kakay get away?!" C-Vegita exclaimed in shock as he and the other warriors gawked at Piccolo.  
  
"I underestimated this man's intelligence." Piccolo confessed, "He was far more intelligent than our Goku."  
  
"A smart Goku, now that's scary." Bulma said as she frowned. "Okay, so now we have a smart evil Goku running around. Are you sure he's evil?"  
  
"Well, if he's not, he sure has a dirty mouth!" C-Goku whispered as he looked around. "He even said D-A-M."  
  
"Damn?" Bulma guessed knowing C-Goku's lack of spelling knowledge.  
  
"Yeah!"  
  
"Okay... well... everyone is still alive so we still have time." Bulma muttered, "All we have to do is figure out what we would do if we suddenly become evil?"  
  
"Why don't we ask Ouji over there?" C-Chi Chi asked, "He's evil."  
  
"Chi-chan! Veggie's not evil! He's misunderstood." C-Goku said as he hugged C-Vegita tightly.  
  
"Well... if I was evil, I would take this world's version of Goku and brainwashed him into my personal servant-maid!" C-Vegita laughed evilly as he pictured himself being served hand and foot by a pair of Gokus in matching servant dresses. "BAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" Suddenly, a huge frying pan slammed into the prince's head. "OUCH!"  
  
"No Vegita is going to get my Goku-chan, not even your more evil Ouji clone." C-Chi Chi said as she held her frying pan in her arms.  
  
"What about you, Dad? What would you do if you were evil?" Gohan asked his father.  
  
C-Goku tapped his cheek as he stared off. "Hmmm... what would I do if I was evil? Hmmm..."  
  
The group stared at the Saiyan for a while as C-Goku stared off into space. Finally, C-Goku said, "I got it! If I became evil, I would go off and get all the fish in the world and eat it all up!"  
  
At once, everyone facefaulted and C-Vegita exclaimed, "That is insane! If you become evil, you would eat all the fish in the world?! What kind of Saiyan are you?"  
  
"The cute and cuddly type." C-Goku giggled as he turned red.  
  
"What about you?" Krillian asked C-Chi Chi, "If you were evil, what would you do?"  
  
"I know!" Bura exclaimed as she jumped up. "She would tie Kakay up and hide him into a deep dark mysterious cave... she would beat him up and steal his virginity! She would use special Ki restraints and shields so Daddy won't find him and rescue him from the evil princess' clutches!"  
  
"Go-chan's not a virgin!" C-Chi Chi screamed, "We had two sons together!"  
  
"So?" Bura asked, "That doesn't mean that Kakay and Daddy aren't meant for each other!"  
  
Krillian leaned next to a shocked Bulma and whispered, "Your daughter may need some therapy."  
  
"I HEARD THAT!"  
  
"Okay! I got it!" C-Goku exclaimed, "If I was evil... I would go off and get all the Dragon Balls to summon the dragon to make an evil wish... I would wish for all the fish in the world!" C-Goku gasped and shuddered at the thought. "Oh no!!! Evil me and the others must be plotting to steal all of the fish in the world!"  
  
At once, everyone sweatdropped and Piccolo said, "I doubt that evil Goku would do anything like that. He may think of something bigger."  
  
C-Goku blinked and then gasped. "Oh no! Evil me will steal all of the fish in the universe!"  
  
"I doubt that this evil you would try to get all the fish in the universe. But, he may be going after the Dragon Balls!" Bulma gasped and then sighed in relief. "But they will have a hard time since the Dragon Balls have already been used."  
  
"We can set a trap to catch those fakes with the dragon radar!" C-Vegita exclaimed and then he teleported out.  
  
*****  
  
"Okay, I think it's this way." Vegita said as he, Goku, and Chi Chi went down the hallway. Their disguises worked better than any of them expected, they keep on running into Z warriors and selling them magazine subscriptions.   
  
They came down the hallway to see a huge sign with the Dragon Ball radar in the middle of a circle that said 'Dragon Ball Radar here; this is not a trap.'  
  
"You gotta be kidding me." Goku said as he glared at the sign and radar.   
  
"That is a pathetic excuse for a trap. Who would be stupid enough to fall for that?" Vegita muttered as he looked around to see a pair of familiar eyes peeking out of the closet.   
  
"Oh no! Those poor sales people are going for the trap!" A familiar high pitch voice squeaked.  
  
Goku looked up to see the stupid Goku ran up and grabbed the radar. The other Goku screamed as he was sunk into the circle until he was waist deep. "I'M STUCK!!!" C-Goku wailed.  
  
"Oh... for the love of Dende." Goku moaned as he grabbed the counterpart's arms. He tugged and pulled the warrior out. "You okay?"  
  
"YOU SAVED ME!" C-Goku screamed in pure joy as he hugged his hero.   
  
C-Vegita blinked as he looked at Vegita and Chi Chi. They seemed oddly familiar and yet he couldn't figure out where he saw them before. "Who are you?" He asked.  
  
"They are the salespeople I was talking about earlier." C-Goku replied as he hugged Goku again.  
  
"Let go of me, you idiot." Goku growled as he went super saiyan.  
  
C-Vegita gasped as he pulled C-Goku away and held him. "Stand back, Kakay, they are evil clones!"  
  
"How do you know?" C-Goku asked, confused. At once, everyone except for C-Goku facefaulted.  
  
"HE'S A SUPER SAIYAN!!!" C-Vegita boomed as he pointed to a Super Saiyan Goku.  
  
"Wow!!! What a coincidence!" C-Goku exclaimed, "Wow! This Super Saiyan thing is catching on!"  
  
Goku slapped himself on the head and took off his glasses. "I am Goku you idiot! I am a Super Saiyan and I am getting sick and tired of seeing myself having an IQ of a cantaloupe!"  
  
C-Goku's eyes teared up and he wailed as he hugged his Vegita, "Veggie! This Goku hates me!!! WAAAAHHH!!!"  
  
Chi Chi scowled at her Goku. "Goku! I apologize to him!"  
  
Goku sighed as he looked at the crying other-Goku. He may have hated this Goku since he acts like he has only half-a-brain but he still hated making others upset. "I'm sorry, I was tense." Goku said as he dropped out of Super Saiyan form.   
  
C-Goku sniffed and looked up with sad eyes. "You mean it?"  
  
"Yes, I am sorry." Goku said as he held out his arms.  
  
C-Goku grinned and hugged his alternate. "Yay! This means that you and the other Chi-chan and Veggie-chan are good after all!" C-Goku proclaimed as he hugged the warrior tighter.   
  
Goku rolled his eyes and patted his counterpart on the back. "Yes, that's right we're good."  
  
C-Vegita scowled as he stared at the two. "Hey! No one hugs Kakay but me!"   
  
Vegita and Chi Chi looked at the alternate Vegita oddly. "Why do you care so much about who your Kakarot hugs?" Vegita finally asked.  
  
"Because he's my Kakay!" C-Vegita pouted, "Kakay only hugs me with his special Kakahugs!"  
  
"Kakahugs?" Chi Chi repeated, stunned at the behavior of this Vegita and his 'Kakay'.  
  
"Kakahugs?" Vegita repeated as well. He was angry at this counterpart, he and that Kakarot were acting like they were a couple. If he had thought that he had seen Kakarot do stupid things, this Kakarot made his Kakarot look like Dr. Briefs.  
  
"Yes, Kakahugs! Doesn't your Kakarot give you Kakahugs?" C-Vegita asked, baffled. These alternate versions of Kakay, himself, and the Onna were weird and scary. This version of Kakay didn't grin and he said dirty words.   
  
"Of course not! I don't hug men and I don't like being hugged by men!" Vegita screamed at the top of his lungs.   
  
C-Goku gasped as he finally let go of Goku. "You... don't like being hugged by me?" He said in a shocked tone of voice.  
  
"I'm a man. Men don't hugs." Vegita replied.  
  
"Awww!!! Let me hug you!" C-Goku gushed as he hugged Vegita. Vegita fought every urge to blast this Kakarot off to King Yemma. He was good now. He shouldn't blast alternate versions of his rival up.   
  
"Why won't you hug me?" C-Vegita asked as he pouted.  
  
C-Goku let go of Vegita and said, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to neglect my Veggie!" C-Goku grabbed C-Vegita and hugged him tightly. Much to Vegita's disgust, his alternate counterpart blushed brightly.   
  
"I don't know whether to be disgusted or just plain weirded out." Chi Chi said as she crossed her arms.   
  
"Tell me about it." Goku nodded stunned.  
  
"Go-chan!" C-Chi Chi shrieked as she came up and pulled her Goku away. "Don't you dare lay an arm on that nasty dirty Ouji!"  
  
She looked at C-Vegita and the Saiyan said, "Onna."  
  
"Ouji."  
  
The two glared at each other like arch rivals. Chi Chi and Vegita were stunned at how much their counterparts hated each other.   
  
C-Chi Chi glared at her counterpart and glared at her. "Hello, phoney."  
  
"I'm as real as you are, maybe even more." Chi Chi growled.  
  
"It's Oh-kay! These clones are good clones! They are just a little weird." C-Goku replied as he grinned.  
  
"A little weird?" Goku, Chi Chi, and Vegita asked insulted.  
  
*****  
  
After straightening out the mess, Goku, Vegita, Chi Chi, and their counterparts and some of the other warriors gathered in the living room.  
  
"Your Goku and Vegita don't hug?!" C-Chi Chi exclaimed in pure shock.  
  
"That's right. They don't spar on a regular basis and they don't call each other 'Kakay' or 'Veggie'." Chi Chi replied as she sipped her tea. She and the other Chi Chi had been talking and comparing their Gokus.   
  
"Really? You are so lucky." C-Chi Chi moaned as she held her hanky. "Day and night, I have to fight to keep those two apart. I have to, to keep a horrible future from happening."  
  
"What kind of future?" Chi Chi whispered interested.  
  
C-Chi Chi looked around and said, "I used Mirai's time machine to travel into the future... when I got there..." she paused as she put down her tea. "it was horrible... Vegita was ruler of Satan City, which was called Saiyan City or something like that and Goku... *sob* my Go-chan was Vegita's princess!"  
  
Chi Chi stared at her counterpart wide eyed. "Pr-pr-PRINCESS?!" She screamed as she fell over laughing. The others gawked at the overwhelmed woman. Tears came down her cheeks as she held her sides. "I never heard of anything so ridiculous in my life! Princess?! BAHAHAHAHA!!!"  
  
"It's not funny!" C-Chi Chi powered up as she turned red with anger. "How would you feel if you saw your husband dressed up, wearing makeup, and speaking that nasty Vegtese?"  
  
Chi Chi stifled a chuckle and replied, "I would be very confused but that would never happen. For one thing, my Goku wouldn't be caught dead with the title of 'Princess'. What about yours?"  
  
"Get away from me!" Goku threatened as he walked through the living room and then the other Goku who was dressed in a long pink dress with a crown on his head, followed him with a bunny suit in his hands.   
  
"But it would look so cute on you!" C-Goku insisted as he held the suit over Goku.  
  
"I would rather die... again!" Goku said as he shoved the suit away.  
  
"Does that answer your question?" C-Chi Chi asked.  
  
Chi Chi stared at the alternate Goku and said to her Goku, "Goku, I will never call you an idiot ever again."  
  
Goku grinned at his wife and then the other Goku grabbed Goku by the arm. "Come on! Try it on!"  
  
"I'd rather starve myself!" Goku growled.  
  
The two Chi Chis gasped as they watched the two Gokus. They both knew about Goku's love for food and starvation wasn't an option.  
  
"Please!" C-Goku gave him a puppy-eyed look.  
  
"NO!!!"  
  
"Awww..."  
  
"This is getting hard." Miari moaned as he held his head. "I'm so confused!"  
  
"Why won't the alternate Kakay and Vegita get together like my Daddy and his Kakay?" Bra wondered as she watched the scene.  
  
"NO!" Vegita boomed as he came in with the smaller Vegita trailing him with a piece of paper. "I will not give Kakarot to you!"  
  
"Wha?" Goku asked, stunned, "How can Vegita give me to the other Vegita?"  
  
"It's right here." C-Vegita said as he handed Goku the contract.  
  
Goku held the contract and read it slowly. "This contract hereby grants the first Vegita the ownership and right to rule the peasant Kakarot of the second Vegita?! PEASANT?!" Goku glared at the shorter Vegita. "Vegita doesn't rule over me!"  
  
"He doesn't?" C-Vegita asked, confused.  
  
"Of course I don't, you moron!" Vegita said as he stood in front of Vegita. "Kakarot is my equal. I don't care about Kakarot obeying me. He is even a better warrior than myself."  
  
*****  
  
"Look at me!" Zarbon said as he skated across the now frozen lava pool in a pink tutu.  
  
A random demon looked up and more snow fell over them. "Great, more snow."  
  
*****  
  
At once there was moment of silence as the shocked warriors stared at the taller Vegita.   
  
"You... call Kakarot a better warrior than yourself?!" C-Vegita exclaimed, "What kind of Saiyan are you?"  
  
"A sane Saiyan, unlike a certain handsome but _shorter_ warrior I know." Vegita replied as he looked down at C-Vegita.  
  
C-Vegita growled as smoke came out of his ears. "That's not fair! Why does my counterpart have to be taller than me? It's not my fault I'm vertically challenged!"  
  
Goku and everyone else glanced over at the two Vegitas and noticed the unique difference in height. "Say, Vegita, how come you are taller than this Vegita?" Goku asked his Vegita.  
  
Vegita smirked at his counterpart and replied, "It's simple, I grow more slowly than most other Saiyans. Most Saiyans, including both Kakarots and their brats, sprout up after a certain age. I am different, I grow taller gradually over my lifetime. In fact, I am still growing and won't stop for a long time."  
  
"So that explains it." Goku said as he studied his Saiyan comrade. "I thought you looked taller than when we first met."  
  
"That's not fair! How come I won't grow any taller?" C-Vegita pouted as he sat down.  
  
"Awww... I still love you, Veggie! You're so nice and small and just right for my lap!" C-Goku said as he picked up the smaller Saiyan and hugged him.   
  
"Oh Kakay..." C-Vegita blushed as he hugged back.  
  
"I feel sick." Goku moaned as he turned green.  
  
"Ditto." Vegita agreed as he turned an equal shade of green.  
  
"No wonder you work so hard in keeping those two off of each other." Chi Chi said to her counterpart.  
  
"Scary isn't it?"  
  
"Very."  
  
Goku looked down and said, "Look, why don't we figure out how to get home? I'm sure the others are getting worried about us. Can we use the Dragon Balls?"  
  
"They're inactive, _Ouji_ used those Dragon Balls to turn Go-chan into his servant-maid and made them immortal." C-Chi Chi replied as she clenched her fists.  
  
"You're immortal?" Vegita asked his counterpart.  
  
"That's right. I finally got my wish." C-Vegita said smugly. "I can teleport, am immortal, and have Kakay's love for me. What do you have?"  
  
"Height." Vegita replied as he looked down at his counterpart on Kakay's lap, "And more common sense than your pea brain can provide."  
  
"Wait a second." Goku looked over at his counterpart, "If you were turned into a servant maid, how come you're not a maid right now?"  
  
"Oh, we used the Dragon Emergency Hotline." Bulma replied, "The Dragon can only revoke one wish so we revoked the servant maid wish."  
  
"Oh... I didn't know there was a hotline. What about you, Bulma?" Goku asked Bulma, "Didn't you have some kind of Interdimensional portal?"  
  
"I do, but it's broken." Bulma sighed, "And I don't know if the portal will go back to your world after I get it fixed. For all we know, it may end up in a completely different timeline."  
  
"Awww..." The group moaned.  
  
"Damn it." Goku muttered, "Looks like we're stuck here until either Bulma comes to rescue us or the Dragon Balls recharge."  
  
"You mean to tell me that we'll be stuck with these weirdos for another year?!" Bura exclaimed as she pointed to the alternate warriors.  
  
"We're not weird." Chi Chi insisted as she rubbed her forehead. "Honestly... I don't know how much longer I can hold out... my kids... they must be worried sick."  
  
"It will be okay, Chi Chi." Goku said as he hugged his wife.  
  
Vegita sighed as he patted Chi Chi on the shoulder. "You know those brats are strong, they can handle it. They will figure out a way to bring us back home if we can't do it here. We can handle staying in this world for a while."  
  
"You don't have to worry about that." A familiar voice said from the back of the room.  
  
The group looked behind them to see a tall man with long dark hair and Saiyan armor came up.   
  
"Big Bro!" C-Goku gushed as he ran up and hugged the man.   
  
"Raddtiz?!" Goku exclaimed in shock as he powered up.  
  
"I'm not Raddtiz." The man said as he pushed C-Goku away and stared at Goku, Chi Chi, and Vegita.   
  
Goku came up to the warrior and stared at him. "Gohan?"  
  
**note** Chuquita's Gohan will now be C-Gohan.  
  
"No way." Chi Chi and the other Chi Chi whispered at once.  
  
"I'm from a different timeline." Gohan explained as he grinned slightly. "I was sent by the Kaioshin to get you guys back home to your dimension."  
  
"What a relief." Chi Chi said as she came up and studied her 'son'. "Why is your hair like that?"  
  
"He looks all saiyany with that hair and armor!" C-Goku said as he ran his hand through Gohan's long hair.  
  
"Dad, please don't touch the hair." Gohan moaned. **And saiyany isn't even a word!**  
  
"This is weird." C-Gohan confessed.  
  
"Thank you for coming here but how did you find out?" Goku asked, stunned.   
  
"There were reports of unstability in this universe. It's consistent with all incidents of inter-dimensional travel but yours was quite severe. You three managed to cause three snowstorms in Hell in just a few hours." Gohan replied as he held up pictures of Freeza and the Ginyu Force having a snow ball fight.  
  
"Ooh! It's snowing down there?!" C-Goku asked and then he vanished. He reappeared holding a snow ball. "It is snowing down there! Look Veggie! We can have a snowball fight with Freeza! Won't that be fun?"  
  
Goku and Vegita paled and Goku quickly grabbed Gohan by the arm. "Get us out of here _now_." Goku pleaded, "I can feel my brain shrinking just being around him."  
  
"I fully agree, I refuse to be with a midget gay version of myself any more." Vegita said as he grabbed Gohan's other arm.  
  
"Yes, please." Chi Chi nodded.  
  
"Don't worry, I'll get you guys out of this dimension." Gohan said as he looked at the dress wearing Goku. "Umm... Dad, why are you wearing that dress?"  
  
"Because I'm Veggie's princess." C-Goku giggled as he fluttered with his dress.  
  
"I gotta get going." Goku said as he used every ounce of willpower to not bash the man's head in.  
  
"Oh-kay!" C-Goku said as he hugged Goku. "Bye bye, other me!"  
  
"Bye, Goku." Goku said as he patted him.  
  
C-Goku let go and hugged Chi Chi. "Bye bye, Chi-chan's alternate countypart!"  
  
"Bye bye, Goku." Chi Chi said as she turned slightly red.  
  
C-Goku gasped as he let go and looked down at the woman. "Hey! You look just like Veggie when I hugged him."  
  
"No she doesn't!" C-Chi Chi and C-Vegita argued.  
  
"Oh no." Gohan muttered when his cell phone rang. He picked it up and said, "Hello? What?! Another snowstorm?! Yes, I'm taking care of the source... NO! I won't judge the snowman contest!" The warrior growled as he hung up the phone. "I hate it when Hell freezes over."  
  
"Come here, big Veggie!" C-Goku said as he came up with wide arms toward Vegita.   
  
Vegita held up a huge hypodermic needle. "Don't even think about it."  
  
"GAH!" C-Goku screamed and he jumped high into the air leaving his dress on the ground.  
  
The group looked up to see C-Goku hanging on the chandelier in his orange outfit. "How did he get into that so quickly?" Goku wondered.  
  
"The mysteries of this dimension." Gohan sighed, "Come on, we better leave before any more damage is done."  
  
"Right." Vegita said as he gave the needle to his counterpart. "Let's go."  
  
"Goodbye." C-Vegita said as he helped his Goku down.  
  
Vegita nodded as the four displaced warriors gathered together. Gohan chanted in a language that noone could understand. In a bright flash of light, the group vanished.  
  
"Oh no!" C-Goku wailed, "I forgot to challenge other me and other Veggie to a spar!"  
  
"Gah!!! We lost a perfectly good chance to fight!" C-Vegita screamed.  
  
*****  
  
"I'm so glad you guys are okay." Bulma said in relief as she, Chi Chi, Goku, and Vegita were sitting around the table with the Long-Haired Gohan in the back.  
  
"Yeah, it was a little hairy for a while but it was okay." Goku said as he leaned his head back. "That other me was so stupid."  
  
"How stupid can he be?" Bulma asked.  
  
"Do you remember the first time we met and how... naive I was back then?" Goku asked as he stared at her.  
  
"Yes." Bulma recalled the first time she met a little boy who couldn't even tell the difference between boys and girls without patting them down.  
  
"Dumber than that."  
  
"Ouch."  
  
"Yeah." Goku agreed, "I'm so glad to be home and away from him. He and the others were missing a few screws."  
  
"I fully agree with you for once, Kakarot." Vegita looked around and whispered to his wife, "My counterpart and Kakarot's counterpart are gay."  
  
"Gay?"  
  
"Trust me on this... you don't want to know." The Long-Haired Gohan said as he came up. "I gotta get going. You guys take care of yourselves and not mess with inter-dimensional travel. You were lucky to end up in such a harmless world."  
  
"Harmless?!" Goku exclaimed, "That other Goku and Vegita tied me up and drew on me!"  
  
"It could be worst. Trust me on this." The Long-Haired Gohan saluted and vanished.  
  
"I'm glad it's all over. Just thinking about those guys gives me a headache." Chi Chi said as she rubbed her head.  
  
"Yes, it's all over." Vegita agreed.  
  
Suddenly, a bright flash of light appeared and C-Goku and C-Vegita appeared with their version of Chi Chi. "Hiya!" C-Goku gushed, "Wanna spar?"  
  
At once, everyone facefaulted and the gods moan. It will be a very long day.  
  
The End 


End file.
